Posts Tagged ‘Friday’

Wait. Hold up. Slow down, my fellow grammar Nazis.

Yes, I used the word “alot,” which remains incorrect despite its widespread use.

Why did I use it?

You’ll have to go here to find out.

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I wasn’t sure what to post for FF today, but STOP THE PRESSES! Thanks to the ladies at Manolo for the Big Girl, it was brought to my attention that today is Liza Minnelli’s birthday. In honor of that (and to get the song stuck in Bethany’s head), I bring you …

Happy Birthday, Liza, and Happy Friday to the rest of you!

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Can I tell you how glad I am that it’s Friday?

I AM SO GLAD that it’s Friday.

I’ve been down with a cold this week, and today is the first day since Monday that my health has been on the mend instead of in decline. Fortunately, my boss is awesome and let me work from home today so that I could still sort-of relax and recover, but not have to take a sick day.

Anyway, this week’s Friday Frivolity is my latest YouTube obsession (not counting the Phantom Reviewer): “Twilight Sucks! Emo Vampire Song” by The Key of Awesome. Watch and enjoy.

Happy Friday!

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Taylor Swift’s song “You Belong With Me” is a classic tale of boy-meets-girl, girl-waits-an-eternity-for-boy-to-realize-girl-is-perfect-for-him-and-dump-his-current-girlfriend-while-girl-listens-to-him-complain-about-current-girlfriend.

By the time adulthood rolls around, though, it’s not nearly so cute.

Of course, if you haven’t heard the song, look for it on YouTube—preferably with the music video. Then meet me back here.

In response to this song, I have written a version for when the girl gains some self-respect, stops being codependent, and gets tired of hearing the guy complain about the girlfriend he won’t dump.

Note: This song is only partly autobiographical—and may not be in the parts you’d think. Except perhaps for the gun-cleaning, houseplant-killing part. That’s all me.

You’re on the phone with your girlfriend
(She’s a b…witch)
She’s going off about something that you said
‘Cause she doesn’t get your humor—no one does.

I’m in my room on a typical Tuesday night
Cleaning my gun, playing music that you don’t like
But that don’t matter, I’m just doin’ my own thing …

She wears short skirts, I like trousers
I kill houseplants, and she demands flowers.
Can’t wait for the day when you wake up and find
That what you’re looking for
Wasn’t there this whole time

If you could see that there’s no one who understands you
Stop your whining and just man up to
See you’re annoying me
(You’re annoying me.)

Sitting at the bar with you, sipping my G & T
Can’t help thinking of where else I’d rather be
Hearing you complain and thinking to myself:
“Hey, what am I, crazy?”

You had a laugh that could brighten up my whole day
But lost its charm since you asked how much I weigh
You say I’m sweet—I know I’m better than that
Hey, not my fault you’re with a girl like that

She wears high heels, hey so do I!
She likes shopping, and I do … sometimes …
But that’s not what counts when you wake up and find
That who you thought you loved has made you lose your mind

If you could see that simply no one understands you
Been here all along to try to make you see
You both annoy me!

Hanging ’round and waiting ’til you beckon?
Ain’t no way! Not gonna waste a second.
Baby, you annoy me
(You’re annoying me.)

Oh, I remember your drunk calls to my house
In the middle of the night
But you know I’ll kick your a$$ if you try that one more time
Don’t know your favorite songs
Pretty sure I never will
I don’t know where you belong
But I know—not with me

Can’t you see that she is not your only problem?
Been here all along, so why can’t you see?
You’re annoying me…

Hanging ’round and waiting for your beckon?
No way! Won’t waste another second.
Baby, you’re annoying me
(You’re annoying me.)

You’re annoying me…

Have you ever thought just maybe
You’re annoying me?
You’re annoying me…

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I was going to publish a “love letter” to Valentine’s Day that I had already written and published on my personal blog and on Facebook. I may still do that on Sunday.

BUT when I came to sign in to WordPress.com, I found this lovely post on WP’s homepage: 10 Anti-Valentine’s Day Cards. Even if you like Valentine’s Day *coughbethanycough* do check it out. This one, for example, struck just the right chord with me. I may employ the unethical use of office resources and print them out to distribute to my coworkers. (Though it may be inappropriate for my married-with-three-kids boss.)

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This week’s FF comes to you courtesy of my friend Kim, who alerted me to the presence of …


As a horror genre/monster, I can’t handle zombies. Even perusing the site for, oh, 30 seconds gave me the heebie-jeebies. Give me a non-Twilight vampire, a malicious ghost, or an old-fashioned serial killer any day, but for some reason, zombies freak me out more than anything else.

I can still appreciate the humor of the site, regardless. The sad thing is that zombieHarmony provides more useful “match” information than the real eHarmony.

Sorry about the late update, by the way, but due to the ongoing Snowpocalypse in the DC area right now, I was working from home today and didn’t have time, and then when I tried earlier, my Internet was acting up. It’s all good now, though. Happy Friday!

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I’m not sure how long this has been around TEH INTERWEBZ, but “6 Reasons Bacon is Better Than True Love” at “The Oatmeal” has become my Valentine’s Day philosophy this year, and probably forevermore.

A word of warning, however: language and illustrations are slightly salty. Much like bacon. But, also like bacon, they’re deliciously hilarious.

Happy Friday!

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